this is the title of my livejournal

Everything. Everyone hates every habit of mine. And no I don't try to change it. Fuck you!

I'm bored.

Someone entertain me.

1. Where would you like to be right now? A spa. I want to get pampered! This girl doesn't get that kind of lovin' enough.

2. Do you remember when you first started using such colorful language? I think my first word was fuck! Seriously though, I don't remember. As far back as I can remember my mother was using it, so I guess I was too.

3. Was there anything about Cherry Hollow that you liked? Ron Becker.

4. Have you ever had any broken bones or anything you needed to be hospitalized for? I broke my arm when I was a kid climbing a tree in the park. I've been hospitalized for other shit too.

5. What's the deal with your hair changing colors all the time? It keeps life interesting. I dunno, usually when I get bored or I want to change the way my life is going, I just change my hair and everything else follows suit.

At least our new president-elect is totally fuckable. I don't think I could do flabby old McCain. Maybe if I start sleeping with Barak my boyfriend will wake the fuck up and leave me.

I haven't written in this damn thing for a long time, and I'll tell you why.

I screwed up. I got into a relationship with this guy, Tim. Relationships are pretty much a no-no with me, 'cause... well, I'm just not that kind of girl. But anyway, this guy, Tim, I was seeing him around a lot. I've been working at Borders, which has been a feet in itself. They made my dye my hair what they called "reasonable" color, which I decided would be red, but it came out more like strawberry blonde. My manager is named Jim, and he's a bit of a fag, but I guess he's okay in the end. It makes my job kind of frustrating though.

Anyway, this guy, Tim, he kept coming in looking for these books about famous people... Shakespeare and Kings and shit like that. But he was coming in like, every other day for a month. He only bought one or two of them, but he'd just sit there reading all day and eating those cinnamon cookies that they sell in the cafe. I'm fucking addicted to them.

Anyway, at the end of the month I'm about to blow up at this kid. So I went up to him one day and I'm like "What are you doing, stalking me?!" or something like that and he said, "Well I guess you could call it that." I asked him if he wanted to fuck me or what. I guess I'm really lucky Jim didn't find out about that or I would've been fired. But anyway, Tim said he'd rather take me out for a drink first. So I went out for a drink with him at this little, hokey bar, and like, I figured we'd have a few and go back to his place and fuck. But we didn't... and he just kept talking to me and telling me how pretty and amazing I was or something like that, he'd never met someone like me before. I guess it was kind of nice to hear. But anyway, at the end of the night, he paid the tab and drove me home, just like that. Not even a kiss on the way out.

And then the next day he like... showed up at Borders again!!! But he just got a cookie and a latte and sat there watching me all day. It was weird. And then we went out a few days later again. It was soooooo frustrating, I didn't know how to handle this guy. Anyway, eventually we slept together, and that was that.

But then he wanted a relationship. And now we're in a relationship. And I can't get out.

Fuck. This is so just not my thing. And he's so fucking nice. What the fuck am I supposed to do about this?

Your result for The Sexual HELL Test...

HELL LEVEL 3

Raw score: 95%

Take The Sexual HELL Test at HelloQuizzy

Once upon a time there was a girl with eyes like fucking diamonds. They shined so fucking bright that when people looked into her goddamn eyes their souls were fucking obliterated like when marshmallows catch on fire when you only wanted them to be toasty brown and then they just burn right the fuck up like on cartoons when they get struck with lightning. Nothing left but ashes left. GOD MY LIFE IS SO FUCKING BORING.

Please. Someone come get high with me. Or drink with me. Or fuck me in the ass.

I need to get the fuck out of connecticut.

What.
the FUCK?!

I need to get fucking laid.

I don't have the fucking PATIENCE for this journal shit.

Except when I'm depressed. Then I want to just sit here and fucking write everything but then I just get bored and go watch TV or have some booze. The real world is so much better than the institutional life.

I tried to kill myself last month. Patrick didn't like that much. I would've gotten away with it too. I had it all fucking planned out. Except I couldn't find where he keeps the goddamn bullets... so I had to use other means, and they didn't work as fucking well.

Piss off.

FUCK

( ABC Dicks for Free )

Just when you think you're fuckin free and clear the big ugly past raises it's head and says FUCKING HELLO CHARLEY! HOW THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN!?

Snap, Crack, and Poppy. What do you think is in it?

I died my hair purple yesterday.

WHO THE FUCK CAME UP WITH THIS SHOW?!

JESUS FUCKING H. CHRIST!

HORRIBLE UNGRATEFUL SLUTTY BITCHES!!!!!!

My whole fucking weekend was shitty. Patrick came and got me. I haven't even been able to pick up my body and sit on a fucking computer. I'm going back to the couch. All I ever do anymore is watch reality fucking TV.

I made it to California. I up and left one day. I took a bag of clothes and my purse and that is really it. I had Patrick's credit card. I bought a one-way plane ticket. I got out here. I found a hotel. It was great... I had fun. Went to some clubs, got drunk, hooked up with a few guys. I'm buy myself, I was fucking lonely...

Then fucking Patrick canceled the credit card. He was being pissy 'cause I took it without asking him first or something... Now I'm stranded in the hotel. I am probably going to get kicked out because I'm not paying (unless Patrick talked to the head dude or something). I have to wait until he comes out here to "get" me. Whatever.

I haven't been able to move... I've been just laying in my hotel room crying. I'm so pissed. Patrick's such an ass. Why does he hate me so much? Why does this always happen? I don't want to live anymore. I'm tired of all this shit.

I didn't go to work yesterday, 'cause I was hungover. I didn't go today 'cause I didn't feel like it. Guess what?!


I GOT FUCKIN FIRED. =D


California here I come!




Hey Nevan! Did we fuck on my birthday? I can't remember, I was fuckin wasted.

It's my goddamned BIRTHDAY BITCHES

Start celebrating now.


Hahahahaha I am so NOT going to work tomorrow. or the day after. I'm gonna be so hung over.

I fuckin' called out of work today. Patrick's so pissed at me. Maybe if he hadn't KEPT ME UP ALL NIGHT WITH HIS MOANING while he fucked his girlfriend (probably in the ass!) then I would not be so goddamned tired and I could've gone to work today!

He wants me to help pay the bills. Hahahahahaha. Do you have any fucking clue how much money that kid makes compared to me?! Fuck you, Patrick.